Sunday, April 10, 2011

Regrets (6/6)

Chapter 5
September 2012
(Ellen POV)

The loud sob startled me out of my thoughts and my head quickly looked up in time to see William throw himself into Dean’s arms. I tightened my hold on the glass as Dean stood and cradled William in his arms. I could see tears start to slid down Dean’s cheeks and I felt something tighten around my heart.

I wish Jo could see this…I don’t think there would ever be a sweeter sight in her eyes. Jo had promised William that she’d tell his daddy about him someday and he’d get to meet him…I just wish it hadn’t been like this…Jo was too young to be gone.

She had her whole life ahead of her…all this hunting and fighting…look at the price it came with…

(Sam POV)

I felt tears gather in my eyes and I tried to hold them back. I’ve been trying to get Dean to let out his emotions since Bobby told us about Jo…nothing worked. Now here he is crying in a room full of people with his son in his arms.

I still don’t think I’ll ever get used to that…Dean has a son. After a couple of minutes I watched as Dean walked over to Ellen and spoke softly to her. She nodded and he followed her to the back rooms. I sighed and snapped out of my stupor as I looked around for Bobby.

I spotted him leaned against a pool table and made my way over to him. I nudged him and he glanced at me.

“What’s up Sam?”

I shrugged and leaned next to him.

“You look like you got something on your mind.”

He nodded.

“Something rubs me the wrong way about everything that’s happened…do you know where Jo asked Dean to meet her?”

I shook my head.

“No…it looked like we were heading in this direction though…why?”

“Because I found Jo in Kansas.”

My head snapped around and my eyes widened.

“Why didn’t you say anything Bobby?”

He shook his head.

“At the time it didn’t really register…I got there…and saw her…I ain’t seen nothing like that sight before Sam. It was horrible…”

His voice died down and became a whisper.

“I couldn’t even make out Jo’s face…”

I frowned.

“How’d you know it was her then?”

“I tracked her there. It was her hotel room…blonde hair…her stuff was there…along with a picture of William in her wallet. The part that doesn’t add up is why she went to Kansas in the first place…”

I was about to say something when Ellen reemerged from the back. She made her way over to us and her voice seemed off when she spoke.

“I think it’s about time everyone cleared out. It’s getting late anyway. Bobby, think you can help me round ‘em up and kick ‘em out.”

I watched a ghost of a smile appear on his face as he gave her a short nod. He pushed himself away from the pool table and started making the rounds telling people it was time to go. I glanced back at Ellen and she was still looking at me.

I raised and eyebrow, she shook her head and gave me a sheepish smile.

“Sorry Sam. Dean’s already made it clear he ain’t leaving tonight, so I’ll set ‘cha up a room.”

I nodded.

“Thanks Ellen.”

When the last person left the bar I walked to the back and searched around for Dean. I found him pacing in a small room. I leaned against the door frame and glanced around. The room was painted blue with posters of different cars around the room.

It took a minute for Dean to realize I was standing there, but when he did, he stopped pacing and faced me. I gave him a grin.


He nodded in my direction.

“What’s up Sammy?”

I shrugged.

“Not much. Everyone’s gone, so I thought I’d turn in for the night. It’s getting kinda late.”

He nodded, but I could tell his full attention wasn’t on me.

“Sounds good.”

I started to walk away when Dean called out to me.


I paused and turned back toward him.

“Tomorrow morning we’ll figure out where we go from here…that cool?”

“Sure man, that’s fine.”

He nodded again and this time I walked away from the room. I made my way down the hall and stopped at the open door three rooms down. I watched as Ellen made the bed. She must have felt eyes on her, because she turned and gave me a tired smile.

“All ready.”


She walked toward me, placed a hand on my arm, squeezed lightly, and spoke.

“If you need anything just let me know.”

I nodded and she left. I moved into the room, shut the door behind me and plopped onto the bed. Today was one of those days…the kind that changed everything. Where we go from here…well that’s all up to Dean.

I sighed and closed my eyes. This, is something I don’t have to worry about until tomorrow though.

(Dean POV)

I watched the door until Sam was out of sight before going back to pacing across the room. I heard a flush and I turned to the now open bathroom door. William stood there looking at the ground. I cleared my throat.

“You all ready for bed kiddo?”

He nodded, made his way to the bed, and climbed up and under the covers. I watched as he got himself situated. He looked up at me when he was done and I gave him a small smile as I rubbed my hands together.

“Uh…I’m not exactly sure what happens next…”

I trailed off and he shrugged as he fiddled with the pendent around his neck. I squinted my eyes to get a better look at it and he spoke.

“Sometimes mom reads me a story. Other times she tells me about one of her hunts…”

He paused and looked up at me.

“Sometimes she tells me about you…”

I swallowed hard.

“Well I can do that…whichever one you want. I got lots a hunts under my belt…or maybe you wanna hear how I met your mom.”

I saw a grin light up his face and he nodded.

“One questions before I start though okay?”


“Where’d you get that necklace?”

He looked down at it then back at me.

“Mom gave it to grandma to give to me. Told me not to take it off until she came back…”

Why would Jo give him that pendant…unless she thought someone was after him…I shook myself out of my thoughts and pulled a chair next to his bed. I gave him a tired smile.

“Okay…right…the day your mom and I met...”

I told him how his Grandma Ellen left a message on Grandpa John’s phone and Sammy and I came to investigate. The story went on for about fifteen minutes before I heard a light snoring. I looked over and he was fast asleep.

He looked so peaceful in his sleep…nothing like a child who just lost his mother…I ran a hand over my face and sighed. I took a look around the room and I saw a book sticking out further then the rest on his small bookshelf.

I got up, walked over to the bookshelf and pulled it out. I frowned as I turned the book over in my hands. The casing was brown leather and it was then I realized it was a journal. I hesitated for a second before opening it.

I turned to the first page and my eyes widened slightly. It’s Jo’s journal…I kept flipping through pages and when I lifted it a little higher a piece of paper slipped from the back of the book and gently fluttered to the floor. I closed the book and bent down to retrieve the paper.

I glanced back toward the bed, sat on the chair and unfolded the small piece of paper. My hands shook and the journal slid from my lap as I leaned forward. It was a letter from Jo…Oh my god…A loud yell from the other room had me up and moving.

I closed the door to William’s room and ran into Ellen in the hallway. She seemed startled when the shouts came again. I grunted.

“It’s Sam.”

I kicked the door in right as Sam shot up in bed. Ellen and Bobby made there way into the room after me. I moved over to the bed and Sam was breathing heavy. Sweat dripped from him body as he gripped the sheets.


He looked startled and then finally made eye contact with me. His breathing slowed and his eyes were wide and there was something crazy in them.

“What happened?”

He grabbed my arm and his voice came out unhinged.

“Jo’s alive…”

I heard Ellen gasp, Bobby swore and I just stared. No…that can’t be true…Bobby found her…we went to her funeral…but…the note…

“What are you talking about Sam?”

“I just had a vision of Jo…”

He paused and I could see pain in his eyes when he looked at me.

“She was in a hotel…Dean…there was a demon there…and then…he killed mom.”

I reeled back. No…My jaw tensed and I spoke.


He shook his head.

“I dunno.”

“Well think dammit.”

He got off the bed and paced around the room.

“I dunno…I think…”

He stopped and looked in our direction.

“She’s in Duluth.”

“You sure?”

He nodded. I glanced at Bobby and Ellen before looking back at Sam.

“Pack up…we’re heading out.”

I moved back into the hallway, walked down the hall, and opened William’s door. He was still sleeping. I realized the not was crumpled tightly in my hand. I loosened my fist and smoothed out the paper. I read it over again.


I know you’re probably pretty pissed right now…I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about William…I was going to…as soon as things were safe. I know, things in our line of work are never safe, but Dean, you have a list of enemies and I was scared. I didn’t want anything to happen to William. I made sure to tell him about you though. He knows who you are and why you haven’t been around. I made sure that he knows what a great man you are. Listen, I know this is an odd thing to do in a letter, but I need a favor. I need you to go to the last entry in my journal. I knew you would come…I left it there for you. I need your help Dean. I needed to meet you where it all started so we could finally end this once and for all…He’s back Dean…and he’s after our son…

I crumpled the note back up and grabbed Jo’s journal. I started to head out of the room when I came to a stop. I turned around and glanced at William. How can I just leave him…It was then a thought hit me…I grinned…Don’t worry Jo…we’re coming…


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